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NLP

A Template for Healing – Part 1

by Taru Fisher on September 16, 2012

This weekend I had the privilege of attending the NLP IASH Conference and hearing two of the world leaders in NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming), Kris and Tim Hallbom, share their latest work on healing. Their presentation was powerful and moving. They call it a “template for healing”, and I want to share it with you. There’s a lot, so I will split it up into three parts. Here’s part 1:

  • Take responsibility for your condition and let go of resentment, anger and blame. Those kinds of emotions release chemicals that sabotage the healing process.
  • Don’t allow your disease/condition define who you are.
  • Become friends with your diagnosis, and welcome it as having a positive purpose. For example, instead of saying I have a large tumor, re-name it as being a healing, shrinking part of my body. Make it a positive representation rather than a frightening one.
  • Be grateful to the condition for warning you by saying to it, “thank you for my healing”.
  • Carefully figure out who your support team is. Make sure they are hopeful, positive, supportive people who won’t require your support. Your pet may even be a part of your team!
  • Create a simple story (but true) to tell others and especially yourself. Avoid the negative details, and make it matter of fact.
  • Check to see where you are now and what could prevent you from healing. Take on each one and do some work with re-imprinting around it and/or changing limiting beliefs.
  • If you know how to use eye movement integration and/or Dynamic Spin Release, use these tools to provide first aid when feeling panic or fear.
  • Hold both ends of the healing spectrum, healing and NOT healing; acknowledge the shadow side of your condition where you may not heal. This is not to dwell on the shadow, but to merely acknowledge that the possibility exists.

As someone who has a chronic condition (Rheumatoid Arthritis) and who has successfully dis-identified with it, this was so very helpful. It gave me more tools to effect an even greater healing. Good stuff, really good stuff!

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Transitions: An Inevitable Part of Life

by Taru Fisher on August 18, 2010

We transition from babyhood to childhood, to adolescence, to young adulthood, and so on. These are both physical and emotional transitions. Other transitions are less organic, more challenging, and can be downright devastating; like the ones where you get a divorce, experience your children’s absence from your life, are forced into retirement before your time, or are entering elder-womanhood.

Ever since I discovered that my coaching passion lies with women in transition, I have been re-living all the transitions in my life — and there are so very many. Looking back from my 67 year old perspective, I see that life is a series of transitions for everyone. And it’s how we frame our experience of the transition that dictates how well we manage it, and where we end up. Here is my frame, and I find incredibly useful.

Transitions are a fact of life and anyone who believes they are immune to them is probably living in an alternate reality or on some other planet not populated by real human beings in a real world. That said, what is a transition? And is there some kind of predictability or uniformity to a transition?  Well, I think there is. Several years ago while in WealthyMind™ training with NLPCA I learned about the Universal Cycles of Change – 7 patterns that govern our life.

The first cycle is one of Creation and new beginnings, a starting point where a new idea, a new way of life begins. Some examples are starting a new life after a divorce, upon retirement, entering another phase of your life such as elder-hood, starting a business, having a baby, creating a book, to name just a few examples.

The second cycle is Growth, when your creation begins to develop and grow, becoming self organizing. It begins to take shape and new behavior patterns develop around it to foster even more growth. After a divorce, retirement or becoming an elder, you grow a new life. In business, you begin to build a client base; the baby does what babies do — get bigger and more challenging (in a good way); when writing a book you are fleshing out the characters and story. You get the idea.

The third cycle is Complexity to Maturity, where your creation has grown to the point where it takes on a new form, and achieves a steady state where it operates at its’ smoothest. Things are good and everything is going amazingly well. You feel good about it, yourself, and life.

The fourth cycle is Turbulence. This is characterized by growth that has become too complex and a bit overwhelming. Problems start to develop and it becomes apparent that the current structure cannot maintain itself. Turbulence is characterized by minor physical symptoms that are distracting, signs of depression or dissatisfaction with your life. Depending on the subject of the creation, there are other signs and symptoms. For example, in business, perhaps you are dealing with a troublesome employee. In your marriage, possibly serious communications problems are arising. A shift must happen for it to go on to the next level of growth. Ignore the call to shift at your own peril, for if you do, the result is chaos!

The fifth cycle is Chaos. The system begins to disintegrate and chaos is rampant. For example, your marriage is on the brink of divorce, or that pesky employee has sabotaged the business to the point of damage. You always know chaos when it appears; it is unmistakeable.

The sixth cycle is Droppings Off. Life has become so complex that you have to let go of something in order to move forward through a a difficult challenge. In a marriage, that may be divorce. In a business, that may mean a complete reorganization. It usually means we have to let go of a limiting belief, change our behavior, and reframe how you experience the world. You may feel resistance to this phase–it is human nature to want to hold on to what we have–but is is essential to our journey to let go of what has been holding us back.

Even Chaos brings change that’s needed. Just remember to drop off things that aren’t serving you. It can be challenging, but once done, you’ll feel lighter, and more free to enter into the next cycle of Meditation and Inward Silence, where you can heal, rejuvenate and get ready for your next creation (beginning). It’s comforting to know we can get through the challenges life brings, and move on into something better.

The seventh cycle is Meditation and Inward Silence. This is the final phase in the Universal Cycles of Change. We stand in the moment as we are; it may be uncomfortable at first, but remain there awhile and heal. This is a time of rest and rejuvenation, of resting in “being” rather than “doing”. This crucial phase paves the way for the beginning of the next cycle of Creation, where something new and wonderful can begin.

If you examine different aspects of your life like your love life, finances, health, friends, family, career and so forth, you will see which cycle you are in for each one — they will probably be different — and now you’ll have a road map of what to expect and how to successfully navigate the cycle.

What cycle of change do you find yourself in and in what area of life? I’d love to know how this resonates with you!

My joy is coaching women make transitions that create opportunities out of obstacles, and design a new life where they jump out of bed in the morning eager to live their life. That’s what I’m here for — use me.

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What the Heck is NLP?

by Taru Fisher on July 29, 2010

Many of you know that I am a Certified NLP Coach, NLP Master Practitioner, and NLP Health Practitioner. When someone works with me as their Life or Business Coach, they get the advantage of my knowledge of NLP, and the use of some of the most powerful communication tools known.

That said I’d like to answer the question, what the heck is NLP?
NLP – Neuro-Linguistic Programming – is:

  • the ability to be your best more often
  • a powerful and practical approach to personal change
  • the study of human excellence

In the hands of a skilled NLP Coach or NLP Practitioner the power of NLP will:

  • put you in charge of your own motivation
  • help you create a compelling future and a personal pathway to it
  • enhance your self-appreciation and self-esteem
  • create a solid positive mental attitude
  • gain more access to your peak performance

At its heart, NLP is set of tools that let people model excellence in all its forms. Using NLP exercises, tools, ideas, and gems of genius allows millions of people to achieve results and goals they never thought possible. NLP provides specific “how to” skills to create change in one’s self and to assist others in becoming more resourceful and effective. NLP helps you to change, adopt or eliminate behaviors, as you desire, and gives you the ability to choose your mental, emotional, and physical states of well being. NLP is truly empowering and helps you do whatever you do better!
Here’s a quick NLP technique called the Circle of Excellence that can help you attain a state of confidence whenever you need it, for example, when you have a medical appointment and want to be sure you are heard by your Doctor.

Relive Confidence

Stand up and let yourself go back in memory to a time when you were very confident; when you had a strong inner sense of confidence. Make sure it’s one you enjoy reliving. Pretend you are actually back in that situation. Fully relive that moment, seeing what you saw, hearing what you heard, and feeling what you felt in your body.

Circle of Excellence

As you feel the confidence building in you, imagine a colored circle on the floor approximately two (2) feet in front of you.
What color would you like your circle to be? Now, give it that color.
When that feeling of confidence is at its fullest, step into the circle, knowing that this circle contains everything you need to be fully confident. Now, fully experience that confidence.
Step out of the circle.

Selecting Cues

Now think of a specific time in your future when you want to have that same feeling of abundant confidence. See and hear what will be there just before you want to feel confident. Be sure the cues occur just before you used to begin to feel apprehensive.
The cue could be the door to the Doctor’s office, the Receptionist, etc. or even earlier.

Linking

As soon as you become aware of these cues, step back into the circle and feel those confident feelings again. Now, imagine that formerly troublesome situation unfolding around you in the future with these confident feelings fully available to you.

Check Your Results

Now step out of the circle again, leaving those confident feelings there in the circle. Outside the circle, take a moment and think again of that upcoming event. You’ll find you automatically recall those confident feelings.
This means you’ve already been successful in pre-programming yourself for that upcoming event. You’re feeling better about it and it hasn’t even happened yet. When it arrives, you’ll find yourself naturally responding more confidently.

I use this NLP technique before I’m about to give a speech and I go into it feeling confident and capable. That’s a great state to be in before giving a speech!
My husband, James, has created an invisible “Circle of Excellence” bracelet that he keeps on his wrist and throws down in front of him whenever he needs that feeling.
Go forth and create your own Circle of Excellence. I’d love to hear how it works for you.

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Powerful Aging Tip #11

by Taru Fisher on October 7, 2009

A Bonus Tip

Aging is not a disease; it’s a normal stage of a human life. It’s how we THINK about aging that makes it a problem. If we believe the thought viruses prevalent in our society, we will look for those so-called problems of aging. Our very powerful mind will, in fact, create the very problems we fear.

We have in our brain, something called a reticular activating system. It’s job is to filter our experiences in support of what we THINK. For example, if on your way driving somewhere you start to think, I don’t want to hit any red lights, you’ll notice you hit almost (if not every) red light.

If you buy a black car, all of a sudden you’ll notice every black car on the road when previously you didn’t even notice them.

This means you need to have a positive mental attitude; see problems as challenges to be met and overcome rather than some insurmountable issue. Focus on asking for what you want rather than what you don’t want. It will make a world of difference in how you live your life. You can choose joy, or you can choose pain – your choice.

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